WARNING
Jenny Joseph (1932 - )

My inclination when I decided to feature Jenny Joseph's work in these pages was to steer away from her most popular and famous poem, "Warning." For, even though she is known today almost exclusively for this one highly popular poem, she is by no means a one-poem poet, and there are many other excellent choices I could have made.

But, in the end, I chose to go with "Warning," and to return to her other worthy poems at a later date. I can't explain exactly why I decided to do this, except to say that it somehow just didn't seem right to introduce Jenny Joseph with any poem other than "Warning."

This poem was written in 1961. Aside from the fact that it is an excellent and appealing poem, it is well known today for two reasons. One of these is the fact that Philip Larkin chose to include it in his controversial and influential 1973 anthology, The Oxford Book of Twentieth Century English Verse. The second, and probably more important reason, is that a woman named Elizabeth Lucas was granted exclusive publishing rights to the poem in 1984 and proceeded to introduce a popular "When I Am An Old Woman" product line, which includes greeting cards, prints, tee shirts, sweat shirts, purple tote bags, framed quotations, plaques, magnets, decorative boxed note cards, snack trays and other gift products featuring the poem.

Ms. Joseph's poetry was first published in the 1950s by John Lehmann, whose poem "This Excellent Machine" was featured in these pages two weeks ago. Since that time, she has published numerous books of poetry and prose and won many poetry awards for her work. She was born in Birmingham, England, educated at Oxford University, and currently lives in Gloucestershire.

Warning

When I am an old woman, I shall wear purple
With a red hat which doesn't go, and doesn't suit me.
And I shall spend my pension on brandy and summer gloves
And satin sandals, and say we've no money for butter.
I shall sit down on the pavement when I'm tired
And gobble up samples in shops and press alarm bells
And run my stick along the public railings
And make up for the sobriety of my youth.
I shall go out in my slippers in the rain
And pick the flowers in other peoples' gardens
And learn to spit.

You can wear terrible shirts and grow more fat
And eat three pounds of sausages at a go
Or only bread and pickle for a week
And hoard pens and pencils and beermats and things in boxes.

But now we must have clothes that keep us dry
And pay our rent and not swear in the street
And set a good example for the children.
We must have friends to dinner and read the papers.

But maybe I ought to practise a little now?
So people who know me are not too shocked and surprised
When suddenly I am old, and start to wear purple.


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